Pittsburgh in Words

Well, let's see. How do you describe Pittsburgh? I think most of my family and friends who journeyed here for my wedding would use words like: frustrating, maze-like, confusing, easy to get lost. And that's about right.

I have had one person (from Michigan) tell me that in Pittsburgh there is no straight line from Point A to Point B. Ed and I have been watching documentaries on Pittsburgh from the library (interesting, but I think he finds it more so since Pittsburgh is his home and not mine). On one of them, the narrator remarked that he tells newcomers it takes five years to find your way around. My response, "You mean I have to live here for five whole years?"

I think part of the confusion is that Pittsburgh has, like, a million suburbs. They are called townships or burroughs. What the difference between the two I have failed to discover. Even Google doesn't explain it well. They all, technically, have Pittsburgh zip codes. However, my license says "Bellevue" even though I live in "Avalon". To make things worse, the legal address is "Pittsburgh". However, there is an Orchard Ave both in Bellevue and in Avalon. Things can take a bit to get here...and it confuses the UPS guy to no end.

All the suburbs also confuse me. For one, I don't know where half of them are. And when a Pittsburgher (yes, they call themselves that) says "Southside", I think I'm suppose to know what townships/burroughs are down there and so know what they're talking about. But I haven't a clue. I live in "Northside". Kinda. It's really more northeast, but they're not that particular about directions.

And if I'm not confused enough, then my GPS is really turned around. It can't always keep up where I'm headed. Nor does it give very good directions. Or directions fast enough. In fact, I've just about given up using it.

People in Pittsburgh have funny accents. I ran into a couple of guys at the laundry mat I couldn't understand to save my life. To give you an example, let's say you want to watch "Downton Abbey" - they say "Donton Abbey". It's worse than Minnesota!

But they do have a good firework show on the 4th! We watched it from Mt. Washington, the overlook of the city from the Southside. They shoot the fireworks from a barge out on one of the rivers near the Point (where the three rivers meet). And it is breathtaking. But, as the little girl standing next to me informed her friends: "They only come out once a year."