Four Years

Just this past Sunday, a man at church turned to me and asked, “Melissa, how do you pronounce your last name?”

Since that is not an uncommon question, I almost answered right back in what probably sounds like a very Southern draw in order to capture the one vowel to its fullest, “Sturm.”

But I just stopped myself.

And since that is not an uncommon question, I promptly answered, “Camus. We pronounce it just like it’s spelled.”

Today, Ed and I have been married for four years. Not a huge amount of time, really. But since in the United States, on average a marriage only lasts for seven to eight years, maybe it is a long time. And since I’ve lived in but one house (out of seventeen) for longer than four years…well, it might be all about perspective.

And yet I still catch myself before answering “Sturm” to the question of what is my last name. If I’m scolding myself, I always say, “Melissa Michele Sturm…um, Camus.” I’ve never had a problem signing my new name, but 99% of the time I initial something “MS” and then hastily add the “C”. And I continually look at the bottom of an alphabetical list to find myself. (Because “S” is at the bottom of lists. Looking anywhere near the top at “C” is very foreign.) Guess 34-year habits die slow.

I think every year Ed tells me he is not going to ever be the husband who forgets our anniversary. And he always plans a little something. Since we had just been to D.C., this year that meant we went out to dinner as a family. But he did ask what I wanted for our anniversary and I told him I would really like another chain for the necklace he had bought me when we were courting. I hadn’t worn it for over a year because Ethan goes for anything shiny and had broken the chain early on in his life. Not having a lot of money for things like silver chains, well… But with my working, we have some spare cash and I really missed having it. But once I thought about it again, I downplayed it because do I really want to spend what little spare cash we have on jewelry? No.

And yet…

Last night, Ed said we could at least go and look at chains after we went out to dinner. I agreed it wouldn’t hurt to see how much one would cost. But when he came home from work today, he had a little gift: a silver chain for my necklace. And, knowing me, he hastily promised it had not cost much and the guy at the jewelry store probably thought he was a terrible husband and really cheap. I laughed. The guy at the jewelry store doesn’t know me at all. But my husband does. And that it didn’t cost much made me all the happier. About as happy as wearing it right now does.